Mothers Day in the UK is this weekend and usually I would do a gift guide but this year I wanted to instead share some images of motherhood that fill my heart with happiness. In these photos there is love, playfulness, joy, laughter, intimacy, nurture, freedom and bonds so evidently depicted and the qualities that are fundamentals of being a mother or a mother figure. My journey with motherhood began long before we had our daughter, it began when my nephew was born in 2010 and there have only been few times in my life in where I’ve felt a profound shift on a spiritual level, a feeling that is almost unexplainable but almost as though something is clicking into place, like destiny is actively appearing before my eyes!
My eldest nephew being born was one of those moments, I remember holding him in my arms for the first time and looking into his eyes that looked as though he already knew everything there is to know about the world he had just entered and I recall feeling love in way that was almost unknown to me and not because I was unfamiliar with love it just was different. Now all these years later, I Know that the love I felt was that of a nurturing and protective nature, the kind of love that intuitively guides you through raising a child. Four years after my nephew was born, my second nephew arrived and though I know that being a mother is different to being an aunty, I can honestly say that I wouldn’t me the same mum I am today if it wasn’t for the presence of those beautiful boys.
Every day with both my nephews and especially with my daughter I am learning the valuable lesson that though they have come into our world, it is going into their world where we truly get to know what their little souls are all about. Through the little ones in my life, I have learnt and continue to learn about patience. To have patience with them to have patience with myself and to remember that both parent and child are on a new journey, a journey that neither of us know much about! We are both overwhelmed with big emotions that we possibly haven’t felt or experienced before and when we keep this in mind we make room for empathy, empathy for how hard, frustrating and overwhelming it must be for our little ones. Because when we think about how we feel at those times during parenthood at least we have our emotional maturity on our side, whereas they are yet to learn! So patience is so unbelievably called for.
Though I had an understanding of going with the flow before motherhood and probably a little bit of that comes from my time with my nephews, something that has been of great value to my motherhood experience is learning to let go of the expectations of what I thought my day was going to be and instead go with what is. This also applies to letting go of what I thought being a mother would be or how my child would turn out and instead accept and adjust to the presence of what is. If we allow it and resist the urge to fight the current and rather learn to move with the ebb and flow, no, it might not be the parenthood experience we thought it would be but by surrendering it might lead us to a journey even more rewarding then we first imagined. I’m by no means perfect at this yet and of course I can get frustrated when things aren’t going as planned but it’s a learning process that I like to think I’m growing through with motherhood.
Another lesson I have learnt and continue to learn about is the importance of self care. Now through my ongoing healing process that predates having Nova-Rose, I came to learn that to be a selfless person, you have to be selfish, or at least every now and again, what I’m saying is, its necessary to nurture ourselves from time to time, to carve and create moments for some alone time to do whatever invigorates, relaxes or recharges ones battery’s. Though I knew this, when I became a mum and I am sure any parent who takes primary care of their child knows, that its almost as though we have to re-learn how to take time for ourselves and this can be really challenging. But to be the best parent we can be, we must make time for ourselves and train our brain to deem it necessary and important as part of our self care. Sometimes we feel guilty for taking time for ourselves but please know that it is your right to make time for yourself and you deserve to enjoy it. Do not feel guilty, I promise your child will only benefit from having a happier parent.
Whether you are celebrating rating mothers day this weekend or not, I hope you have enjoyed todays post. My Journey as mum is one that has and continues to be inspired and supported by my incredible mum, sister and partner. I am so lucky and eternally grateful for the love I receive from them, it has in no doubt contributed to the love I am able to give and express for my daughter. Because when we receive love and are receptive to love from others and from the love we have and give to ourself, we in turn become more loving in the love that we give.
The photos I have used are from my Motherhood pinterest Here where you’ll find the image credit. Sending you love and light,